work

I went to Earth Day at the park. It was cool because their were loads of people there and it was a more hippyish crowd than I usually see.

I could hear Hari Krishna music as I walked in. A Hari Krishna dad urged his daughter to give me a flower. It was a really weird situation because he was like, “Give the flower to the nice lady.” and she smiled shyly at me and seemed like she was about to walk forward. So, I started to bend down and smiled at her. Then she backed up. So, I straightened up and watched the Hari Krishna muscicians who sounded good, but looked like they were on drugs or brainwashed.

The whole time I was standing there, I could hear the dad encouraging his daughter to give me a flower. This went on for a while. Walk forward, I look over and smile, back up. Sheesh! Give me the flower already kid! She finally gave me the flower. I felt like I’d worked for it. At a certain point, I wasn’t about to leave til I got that darn flower. Darn Hari Krishnas.

I walked further into the park looking at the booths. There was a “goths for public service” booth. I thought that was good of the goths, although they still looked somewhat frightening. I’m curious about why you are so into the black and freaky make-up, goths.

As I walked, the Hari Krishna music faded and some awesome funky music got louder. A lot of people were gathered around the stage. Hey! It’s a band I’d heard before. I got an autograph from the lead singer at a Martin Luther King Jr. celebration a couple years ago. They’d really gotten better. Now, I think I’ll keep that poster and autograph after all. Bonus.

(To listen to the band click here. Warning: music starts automatically at the site.)

Then I came to a booth where everyone was sitting down. Figuring I’d walked far enough, I asked if I could sit too. They said I could. They were demonstrating some fruity gadget of the kind that you are likely to see at Earth Fair, but I was game. As long as I could sit there with my shoes off.

I started talking to the guy next to me. He said he ran marathons. He said he ran them barefoot. I said, “Hey, I think I’ve read your blog!” He said his name was Ted. And that’s how I met Barefoot Ted! He was personable and looked very healthy, and his feet looked very strong. I told him that after I read about his blog, when I was training for a marathon, I ran for miles at night in my bare feet.

I also met several of the merchants who I could tell were from Utah by their accents! I stayed at that booth chatting and “earthing” til the end of the fair.

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The author of the Blue Zone has studied long living populations around the world and now has advice for YOU online.

The advice about living longer always says stuff like: have a close circle of loving and supportive friends and family, economic stability, close access to nature, and interesting work. OH BOTHER, close friends and family… well, I guess if it makes me live longer…

Well, duh. I mean, of course I want all those things!

The trick is GETTING those things. I’ve lived what is probably a third of my life and I’m still working on getting all that.

So, I am taking a few simple tips and from the site and putting them into practice:

1. Get rid of your full size plates and use 9 inch plates instead. OK! THAT I can do.
2. Put movement into your everyday life. This one is cheating ’cause I already do that. ;) Walking is pleasure and a perfect stress reliever for me. I’m going to try and boost this one by inviting friends to go walking with me more often.
3. And, I’m going to make more of an effort to go to church every week. I’m blessed to live 20 minutes away from a church with an amazing minister. I might as well take advantage of that.

What are three simple things you can do to live a longer and happier life?

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I wanted to learn Tom Hagerty’s scalp exercises to get the same results he has: no forehead wrinkles, lots of hair with his original hair color. (He is over 74 and still has naturally dark hair!) Previously, I couldn’t even feel the muscles at the back of the head he was talking about. Tonight I tried again and I could almost feel them, but couldn’t feel them enough to have any control over them. Bonus: If you can control those muscles, you can wiggle your ears.

Then I talked to my genius mom:

Me: How’d you do it?

Mom: It helps to look in the mirror at first. When I first started trying to wiggle my ears…

And then I stopped her because, although I knew she could wiggle her ears, it had never occurred to me that at one point she couldn’t wiggle her ears, had wanted to wiggle ears, had made it a goal to do so, and had practiced until she succeeded. !

Me: Wait, wait, WHY did you want to learn how to wiggle your ears?!

Mom: Hmmm… I don’t remember now… but at first I could only just barely see them moving. You know when you move your head out and back like you are an Egyptian?

Me: Yeah

Mom: Well, try and move the front of your face out front while you try and hold the back of your head in place.

Me: Wait… this feels really weird…

And then, wonder of wonder, miracle of miracles, I could squeeze my back scalp muscles together and wiggle my ears.

“Walk like an Egyptian!!”

If you ever need to giggle, try a little wiggle. We were talking on skype and I was very seriously showing her my progress, while she was wiggling her ears too, “Look, look, did you see my ear wiggle!” Then we both started laughing.

The funniest part about this, to me, is imagining my mom looking in the mirror and trying to wiggle her ears, and going about it with the hard working dedication that she applies to most everything. Ahhhh…. funny.

Update 4/15/08: It really works! After just a day of doing the scalp exercise, the horizontal lines in my forehead are significantly reduced! I got those lines young due to my face actually freezing in that expression. :) I hadn’t been able to relax my face consistently enough or do anything else to get rid of them. WOW. This is a truly amazing result, especially after just one day.

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Sometimes it is harder than it looks.

1. Give it time. Give each other space
2. Put some experiences between your relationship and friendship. (Find another romance.)
3. Don’t bring up old romantic memories. Talk about other things.
4. Don’t talk about your new romantic interests. Definitely don’t describe how hot you think they are. Talk about other things.
5. Decide why you want them in your life. If it is for physical affection, it won’t work.
6. Don’t compare your new and old relationships.
7. Do things with your other friends as well.

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My mom is (very happily) married to her 4th husband, so even though I am single, I have seen a lot of different types of marriages up close and I feel that I am highly qualified to answer this question. (Just kidding, I think everyone is highly qualified to answer this question. That’s why I asked! :)

My answer begins with who you should marry:

I think it makes sense to marry someone you are crazy about, someone who lights up your life and twinkles your toes, and is a decent person who treats people kindly, who is willing to work on a relationship, and who has goals that are compatible with yours.

So, if things aren’t going well and you think maybe you want out, should you call it quits? I have three answers for you:

1. YES

I think that if people are in abusive relationships, they ought to get divorced RIGHT AWAY! Don’t try and fix it! Get thee out!  The hard part is, what is abusive? That can be a trickier to answer than you would think when you are in a relationship and much easier to see when you finally get out.

If someone hits you, sexually abuses anyone, or in any other way degrades your soul, then I would JUST LEAVE (make you sure you research how to do it safely if you are worried about the other person hurting you- make your safety your highest priority.)

2. MAYBE

I just read on the Divorce Busting site that 1/3 of the marriages ending in divorce are abusive. That means 2/3’s aren’t.
If you are not in an abusive marriage, and you never felt twinkly about the person you are with, and you don’t have kids, I just don’t know. My only advice is that you do everything you can to improve the relationship and even if you decide not to try and keep your marriage alive, at least do everything in your power to be a true friend to the person you married.

I think that if you do decide to get divorced even after you make every effort to improve your relationship, the thing that will comfort you is that you have a healthy relationship of some kind and that you treated and continue to treat the other person very well. (And who knows, you might find that you can create a very satisfying relationship with the person you are with after all.)

3.Do Your Best To Save Your Marriage

If you once felt twinkly about your partner, if the person just annoys the hell out of you, you have lost interest in them, if you feel repeatedly rejected because they have lost interest in you, if you no longer find sex satisfying or any other host of problems- but they are not abusive, and especially if you have kids,

Then I would say do EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING in your power to make it work.

I’m thinking about this right now because I stumbled across the site: Divorce Busting and while I am very, very glad that divorce exists for anyone in abusive relationships, and I HIGHLY recommend high tailing it out of there (you can be so much happier when you are with someone who treats you well, you won’t even believe it), there are many people whose families are torn asunder who probably could have mended things if they had just known how. That is really tragic.

I really wish some of my friends, and my friend’s parents had access to this information back in the day.
Especially interesting articles from the site:

1.  The Walk Away Wife Syndrome
2. Hopefully Ever After 
3. He Must Be Teething

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I got in a rare argument with my mom last night. I threw out the wild and crazy idea that our family could get together and have a reunion every year for a week. She said that it was ok to want that but not to expect that to happen. I said that I thought getting together for *ONE* *WEEK* a year didn’t seem like an outrageous thing to expect and if my family couldn’t prioritize that amount of time for me then maybe they were more like acquaintances than family and I would get my own other family!

Then I said I had to go because I had an improv class. She said, “What, you can’t even prioritize talking to me on the *phone*?” “No!” I said. Then we both said, “Bye, I love you.” Because neither of us wants to leave with bad words in case one of us dies before we talk again.

Oooh I was irritated all the way to improv class. I needn’t have worried, because it’s easy to be happy in improv and tonight was especially funny. The theme of the night was “Yes, AND…” There are all kinds of “Yes, and” games. The idea is that someone throws out an idea, and WHATEVER it is, you agree with it and add information. (It’s very much like dancing.)

Say you have a scene where you are in a bank and your partner says, “I love that ballarina outfit you’re wearing!” You don’t say, “I’m in a bank, why would I be wearing a ballerina outfit?” You say… anything that agrees with their reality. “Oh thank you! I love the tights, but do you think the tutu is too much?” Or…”Yes, darling, it’s intermission at Swan Lake and I have just enough time to cash my latest honorarium if you wouldn’t mind letting me just tip toe ahead of you in line.”

You even “yes and” offerings that you find sort of repulsive. “Didn’t you used to date George Bush?” “Yep, we went out for a couple months. We met in rehab.”

It was an especially funny night, I was glowing from the laughter, and as I was driving home my mind turned back to the argument. I imagined answering some improv friend’s questions about my fight with my mom: “Yeah, I think that if she had just said. ‘Yes! That’s a great idea! It would be so awesome to get together with all of our family! I love that idea. We could even rent a boat or something!’ Then I would have been happy. Then we could talk about ways to make it happen and find out if it might or might not work….”

“Yeah, good point, I could have yes-anded her too. ‘Yeah, you’re worried that it’s just not going to happen and you want me to be happy about whatever amount of time I do get. Yeah, I hear you, you don’t want me to be disappointed.’ True, I could have said something like that. And I often do, when I’m in a more mature mode. Plus I know I toss out what sound like wild ideas to my sometimes cautious mother and I have empathy for where she is at and her concerns for me. But, come on, I wanted one month a year, so I’d already brought my suggestion down to what I thought was crazy reasonable before I said it!”

My imaginary improv friends lost interest at this point. Rude.

Now you know how to respond to me when I tell you an outrageous idea.

Just tell me that you like my tutu and leave it at that.

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I was listening to an interview with Peta activist Dan Matthews today on the radio. (I’d link to it if I could find it for you!) He recently wrote a book about trying to bring animal cruelty issues to the public called Committed.

It’s an interesting issue that I’ve been thinking about for a long time and I’m not sure yet if my life is matching up with my values. I’m still working it out. And like Alicia Silverstone says, it’s not all or nothing.

Here’s a list of what I think of animal rights and what I do:

Eating

I think that it is ok to eat animals and animal products, but not ok to be cruel to them. I don’t think raising or eating factory raised animals is ok.

What I do: I only buy fish or birds to eat. I try and buy “organic” “free range” birds and wild caught fish, but it’s really hard to tell how the animals were actually treated. It might be easier just to be vegetarian. I eat eggs but only “cage free” eggs. I buy eggs from birds raised on small farms when I come across them, even if they cost more.

The book In Defense of Food has reasonable and balanced guidelines for eating in a way that is healthy for us and the earth. He doesn’t advocate vegetarianism, but does advocate eating heavy on the vegis and light on the animals. This is more of an ecological way of looking at animal rights rather than caring about individual animals as much, but he is against eating factory raised animals.

Animals I wouldn’t eat even if I were starving. They are part of my tribe.

Hunting

Watching animals die at factories on Peta is like watching animals die on the discovery channel. It’s a harsh world in some ways, but should we contribute to that? With our human ingenuity we have really pushed cruelty over the top when it comes to killing other animals, simply due to efficiency. To bring our behavior more in balance with the rest of nature, I think we should at least be as ineffective as other predators and hunt for food we eat. (We, like wolves, are predators- see our forward facing eyes and motions.)

What I do: My behavior isn’t in line with this belief because I don’t hunt. I did go hunting with my dad and older brothers when I was a kid. They taught me how to shoot a gun. I loved hunting until they actually shot a deer. Then I cried and cried and cried.

Food I didn’t have to hunt for.

Clothing

I’m allergic to wool. I have very few shoes. A couple pairs are leather. I keep my shoes for so long (decades) that I don’t feel bad about that. If everyone had my shoe habits, very few cows would need to be killed for leather. So, I guess moderation is my general principle here. I’d definitely be willing to buy shoes made out of other materials too.

I think it’s alright to buy any kind of animal made products at a thrift store because buying them at a thrift store doesn’t contribute to the industry that makes those products.

Pets and feral animals

I have a friend who is a vegan AND a biologist. She thinks that feral cats should be killed because they upset the native bird population. It’s an interesting way of looking at the issue. As a biologist, she is looking at the population as a whole, but as a vegan, there must be some concern for the individual animals. (I think it can be successfully argued that you can raise and eat meat on small farms and other ways that are in balance with the environment.) Interesting.

I think it is horrifying to kill feral cats. I think a good thing to do with them is to catch them and spay or neuter them. Growing up, we adopted stray cats that wondered into our yard and spayed or neutered them. Last year my mom caught feral cats in her neighborhood in traps, got them spayed or neutered, and then released them back into her neighborhood. So, when it comes to these cats, I think of them as individuals, but when it comes to hunting, I’m ok with hunting for food because I’m thinking of the effect on the population overall and how it balances out ecologically.

I’m not saying either of these ways of thinking are better. I’m just thinking through this and noticing these interesting inconsistencies.

Feral cat in my mom’s backyard, neutered but not killed, and still on the prowl.

Animal Testing

Cosmetics: Absolutely not ok with me. I try and make sure I only buy things that haven’t been tested on animals. To survive, I can understand eating other animals, but for the sake of looking cuter?? No way.

Medical testing

This one is tricky. There is A LOT of lab work being done on animals in research centers and universities. I would never do this work. Does this make me a hypocrite for using the medicine that comes out of this work? My Granddad is on three medications for Alzheimer’s right now. I’m glad this medicine exists. It seems likely that it was tested on animals. What do you think about using this medicine?

I went to a lecture at the university I was working at. What they found out was facinating and might help humans a lot, but when I heard how they figured it out using lab animals, I wanted to cry and retch. After seeing that presentation I thought, maybe it isn’t so tricky. Maybe the sum total of what we’ve gained by dissecting creatures physically and dissecting reality into it’s component bits in our Western intellectual tradition does not equal what we would have if we lived and thought more holistically.

Granddad who I love very much who is helped by medication probably tested on other animals.

What do you think about these issues? I would love to hear from you.

Thoughts? Insights that makes any of this more clear? Any of your own inconsistencies that you notice?

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I just read a really interesting book called Awaken Your Strongest Self by Neil Fiore. It’s a little strange on first glance but I bought it based on the amazingness of his last book The Now Habit which is a highly lauded book about how to overcome procrastination. I read it before my last semester of grad school and the method he suggested really worked for me

In his new book, he talks about how the different parts of our brain can work together in harmony. There are a few ideas in his book that I’d tweak and some additional information I think would be useful to add that I might talk about in another post. He suggests a lot of homework that I haven’t done yet, so I can’t speak to the effectiveness of this program. I have hung a lot of the affirmations he suggests up in my house and I’m beginning to see the value and wisdom of them.

In his book, he says that, among other parts, we have the emotional legacy of our baby self who had limitless possibilities and was all powerful. About typical affirmations that say that anything is possible he says, do you really want your two year old self running the show? Hmmm… Read below to see they type of statements he suggests you tell yourself.

AWAKEN YOUR STRONGEST SELF: Speaking from Your Higher Brain*
Neil Fiore, PhD

When you, from the perspective and roles of your Strongest Self, speak these compassionate statements to the frightened and overwhelmed parts of you, you can:

• Create inner peace by connecting your identity to something stronger and wiser than your ego
• Transition to a new, robust self-image
• Access support and strength to cope with changing situations and relationships
• Reduce the stress and anxiety of struggling alone, separated from your True Self
• Empower yourself with the protective role, higher perspective, and compassionate voice of your Strongest Self

The following inner dialogue is more powerful than typical affirmations because you are speaking to a part of you that is separated from your larger support system and, therefore, is easily overwhelmed and stressed. You are empowered to protect and guide the parts that have limited––and out-dated––ways of coping with life. You, from your new perspective, can shift to an expanded identity that empowers you to protect your body and smaller “selves” and guide them toward inner peace.

In the compassion voice of your Strongest Self, you replace stress with safety and
connection by saying:

• Regardless of what happens in life, your worth is always safe with me.
• Regardless of what you can or cannot do, you are always worthwhile.
• Regardless of whether you win or lose, you deserve love, pleasure, and freedom from self-criticism.
• Regardless of what happens to you, you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. I will always respect my life and my body.
• Regardless of who stays or who goes, I am on my side. I will never abandon you. [My tweak: "... I will always stay with you."]
• Regardless of how healthy or ill you become, I appreciate the effort, wisdom, and protection given me by you, my body and my spirit.
• Regardless of how negative or intense your emotions, I acknowledge their validity for you, and I accept them completely. I am strong enough to be with your emotions. [My tweak: "Regardless of how positive, negative, intense or mild..."]
• Regardless of how uncomfortable others are with you, your feelings or your body, I will always accept you and remain at peace with you. [My tweak: "Regardless of how comfortable..."]
• Regardless of what happens in life, and regardless of your problems, I accept you and love you completely.
• Regardless of the health or weakness of my body, I can always heal my spirit.

*Adapted from Awaken Your Strongest Self [McGraw-Hill, 2006] and
Coping with the Emotional Impact of Cancer (BayTree, 2008)

© Neil Fiore, Ph.D., 1998-2007 All rights reserved. Permission is granted to reproduce, copy, or
distribute so long as this copyright notice and the full contact information listed below attached.
Neil Fiore, PhD, 1496 Solano Ave., Albany, CA 94706 voice: 510/ 525-2673
www.neilfiore.com www.yourstrongestself.com E-mail: neil@neilfiore.com

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Laura over at Pick Me! posted about hoarding today. I started to respond but it got so long that I decided to make it a post instead of a comment.

*

I grew up with a hoarder and I couldn’t stand it! I was always embarrassed to have my friends over. I wasn’t allowed to throw popsicle sticks or plastic spoons away. Not only couldn’t we throw spoons away, my mom would actually bring home her used plastic spoons from restaurants. We had a whole drawer full of plastic spoons. We had 5 boxes full of rock salt filled with rabbit pelts that my mom was going to make into mittens someday.

I carried those 5 50 pound boxes in two different moves. I was opposed to them killing the rabbits I raised, opposed to saving ridiculous things we were never going to use, and opposed to the hard, meaningless labor of carrying the boxes. Grrr… (Hey, I just thought of something I could say in groups when the leader says to introduce yourself and tell people a fact about yourself that would surprise them!) We had a whole bunch of USED toothbrushes. I threw some of these away once and my mom got very upset with me.

If I lived in my childhood home now it would be fun to do a photo journal of all the strange stuff that we had. Very out of date medicine, old jars of canned tomatoes, piles of fabric, boxes of old game and puzzle pieces, closets full of old clothes, corners crammed with dead relatives furniture, one room just FULL of paper- literally piled to the ceiling with paper, including piles of charity solicitations with free address labels. My mom would keep all the paper work in case she wanted to use the free address labels or free cards they sent. Then she would send them money before she used them.

When I lived with my mom for a couple years as an adult, I made a deal with her that I wouldn’t touch the basement if the upstairs could stay clean. When I got particularly frustrated, I would throw everything that I thought was clutter over the banister down the stairs. (Don’t try this at home.)

I’ve read that hoarding is a reaction to loss and the hoarders in my family did have a lot of loss. It adds credence to the theory that when my mom got remarried she got rid of at least 2/3 of her stuff. It was amazing. It was like she was coming alive again and breaking out of some old tomb and throwing off the shackles of the paper and the unmatched game pieces! In reverse, my auntie, who I love, has become more and more ensconced in things since her husband died.

I love getting rid of things if I know they’ll have a good home. I take car loads and car loads of things to thrift stores. (I don’t shop much so I don’t know how I end up with carloads of things to get rid of.) I live in an apartment without much storage space, so when I decorated for Christmas, I just bought strings of lights at a thrift store for 50 cents and took them back after the holidays! And I love that no new things have to be manufactured when I buy them from a thrift store.

I keep things that are beautiful, useful, and/or happily sentimental. I love that I have distilled the objects around me so that everything I see in my room is something I love. (My roommate is a minimalist and probably thinks I’m a hoarder, so it’s somewhat relative.)

I did learn some good things from my mom’s hoarding behavior. I learned that random bits of junk can be useful in art projects. I think that thriftiness and ecology was tied into my mom’s hoarding behavior. She wanted to use everything and everything has a possible use. It’s like recycling. It’s important to me to recycle. I love composting although I don’t compost right now. (no yard).

I also would never throw useful things in the garbage that someone else could use. I’ve seen other people throw perfectly good CLOTHES into the garbage. GASP! No way. Someone could use that!! So, maybe the basic premise of the hoarder has been passed onto me, I just don’t feel the need to store the objects in my space when there are perfectly good libraries and thrift stores to do that job for me.

* Some of the flowers I bought myself with the flower money my mom sent me this Valentine’s Day with probably my favorite collage I’ve made n the background. Made at my mother’s house it is comprised of a bottle of glue I was going to use as glue, it was dried out though, so I cut it open and taped the glue and glue bottle to the collage, which I put in an old frame we had lying around.

Tags: hoarding, mom, family, thrift, recycling, grief

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Hi,

My name is Braidwood and I can not stand books that are fundamentalist when it comes to gender. You know the ones, “The Rules”, “Men are from Mars, Women don’t have a penis.” (or something like that.)

I have a couple friends right now who are really into a workshop that tells them all about what men are like and how men like to be talked to. (ARGH) It’s irritating, but because I love them I’ve thought about the appeal and I think it is this: relationships can be confusing and a set of simple rules can be comforting. “Finally, things will work out. I didn’t know these rules before, now I do, and I will be loved.”

I think the frustrating thing about it for me is that it is so all or nothing. I’m sure there is some good advice in programs like that, but it is either so freaking simplistic or the advice may be good but not attributable to gender. For example, one piece of advice is to ask a man to help you rather than blame him for not helping you. Men are so different than women, so it is probably hard for you women reading this to understand, but men actually prefer someone to say to them, “Will you please help me do the dishes?” rather than, “Why are you such a slob?! Why haven’t you done the dishes already!!?”

I know, it’s revelatory. I’m starting to question my femininity though because when I haven’t done the dishes I prefer that my roommate asks me to help rather than accuses me of being a slob too! Does this mean I’m not really a girl!?

So… it reminds me a lot of horoscopes. I sort of think it is funny to read a different month’s horoscope to people, because people who believe in horoscopes will say “See! That is so me!” No matter what you read. (I know, mean trick, but it’s so sadly funny.) I did the same thing once when my mom got a copy of “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.”

My mom, my boyfriend, and I were driving in the car and my mom wanted us to read to her while she drove. I thought it was inane upon first flip through and didn’t want to read it. My mom and boyfriend started in on me *didn’t I know that men and women really are different? — Do I think they’re the same?? — So, I gave in and started to read to them, but I read everything it said about men as if it said it about women and vice versa. “This is so true!” They said, ” You have to admit, this is is so true.” “There’s some truth to it” I admitted, “but don’t you think some of the things I read about the other gender are also true for you?” “Not really, not like what he says about men/women. It is so amazing!” It’s amazing alright.

““““““““

*I always think it’s funny that the first thing people exclaim when I tell them that I don’t hold some stereo-typical view they hold (and these stereotypical views are always different- women are clean, men are messy; men are organized, women are flaky; women are pragmatic, men are more romantic; women are more romantic, men are staid; men focus on details, women see the big picture; men see the big picture, women focus on details! “Tastes great, less filling!”) is that men and women are different! How can I not believe that! Like just because I don’t believe in their stereotype, I have trouble telling men and women apart. HOW DO I FUNCTION with this mental impairment??!

It just makes me laugh. What is all this fuss about men and women being different? Are a whole bunch of people insecure that they are about to be mistaken for the other gender or what? I don’t understand where this intensity around this issue comes from. I know that men and women are different. You would think that as a non-bisexual person, people wouldn’t have to question me knowing that. I only want to have sex with one gender- clearly some differences must have crossed into my blood brain barrier. I just think the differences are self-evident.**

** (I think that if someone has to intensely argue for certain differences, maybe they doth protest too much.)

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Wow, this is blowing my academic mind:

High-school students here rarely get more than a half-hour of homework a night. They have no school uniforms, no honor societies, no valedictorians, no tardy bells and no classes for the gifted. There is little standardized testing, few parents agonize over college and kids don’t start school until age 7.

As I think, and think, and think about what I want to do next with my life, I find that I am still quite interested in education and educational theories.

This article about Fins and the way they do things is really interesting and appeals to my love of simplicity. I would love to give the same amount of money to all schools, rather than by what area the schools are in. I don’t know if I would like less classes for the gifted. I loved the AP classes I took. Hmmm… I DO love the idea of teachers getting to pick out their own curriculum and of intense teacher competition.

What do you think, What Makes Finnish Kids so Smart?

Tags: Fins, education

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My plans for rat park rather than rat cage living written a couple months ago:

One night a week at a track club: I like running every now and then- I especially like running fast and this track work out is dedicated to speed work.

Dancing: My favorite dance company in my town has moved closer to where I live and I want to take their classes. I’m a little nervous about facing fat prejudice. I love dancing and I have a natural aptitude for it. I hope I’ll be welcomed and not judged even though I bet I’ll have more fat on my body then other people in the class will.

*If you’ve ever faced prejudice, how do you deal with it? Do you call people on it? Do you ignore it and try to prove them wrong through your actions? Do you ignore it? There is so much fat prejudice in our society. I’m worried that it is especially bad in dance classes. Oh well. I gotta dance. I’m going anyway.

**By the way, if you love dancing and are fat, (ie: you have more fat on your body than you feel is socially acceptable) and are afraid to face the fat prejudice, I recommend salsa dancing and swing dancing. There are people of all different shapes there and people mostly just want a good dance partner. A fat safe place.

Wilderness training: I love camping and I haven’t gone camping in about 5 years now. Unheard of! I got a notice in my email for a ten week wilderness training course put on by the Sierra Club. Ten weeks of training and four camping trips to practice our skills! This class is what got the rat park ball rolling.

Writing group: I write almost every day. I have weird mixed feelings about going to a writing group.

*Fantasy: I imagine reading something and everyone exclaiming about how great it is. Afterwards, people come up to me and say that I should be in their smaller writing group, I should publish a book, they know a magazine editor- I should submit an article.

**What I don’t really want is any negative critique. I’m not sure why I’m less open to suggestion about my writing. I think I know when my writing is crappy or blah. What will be useful for me is having a regular time to meet with people every month and preparing writing to be read in public.

Music: I feel almost opposite about music as I do about writing. I don’t want an open mike night to perform at. I want a jam session and I’m open to LOTS of feedback.

2/25/08 Update: I have been taking the Wilderness course and I have been enjoying my time off. I’m blossoming out of the cage office and in my enriched natural environment. I’m glad I found this post which reminds me of so to add in some of the other activities I was excited about as well. Wishing you the oomph to change any cage like situations and get thee some more park like situations.

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I pretty much love this woman. I saw her book The Guerrilla Art Kit in a store today, looked it up online to put on my wishlist, and then went to her blog. Once there, I realized that I had already seen her blog before, probably linked to from an Illustration site?

She has awesome links, and awesome advice. Just check out what she says about Letting Yourself Soar:

PS: She has created an extremely informative period chart. That is what took my “like” to “love.”

Tags: artbooks

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My mom is upset about the costly dental work I just had done that not only did not accomplish the objective of improving my bite, but left my previously pain free mouth with three tender teeth. I just figured I would cut my losses and move to Canada or France, but she thinks I should confront my dentist.

Here is her (slightly tongue in cheek at the end) letter she suggests I send:

Dr. Pat Patruchia xxxx
I came to you on xxx-xx-xx date and explained clearly that I needed my bite repaired. You should have explained to me that this was not your specialty and referred me to a bite specialist. But you didn’t; you told me that you could do this.

After spending 6 hours and $3000. in your office, not only is my bite problem not fixed but 2 other crowned teeth in my mouth that were previously fine are sensitive and often experiencing pain.

All I am asking is that you refund the $3000. I do not want to sue you but if I have to, I will. If I must pursue legal action it will be for more than this – it will also include the cost of repairing the other crowns, it will include my time, and it will include the cost of emotional damage to me, my mother, and my children and grandchildren down to the fourth generation.

Please respond within one week or I’ll be seeing you in court.

She has also consulted her dentist who thinks I did not get good treatment. (Yes, I got a recommendation to go to this dentist, but who really knows with dentists!)

My mom hopes I’m not mad at her for obsessing about my teeth. I’m not mad. She tells me that my great-grandma obsessed about my grandma’s teeth, who got unsuccessful caps on her previously beautiful front teeth, my grandma obsessed about my mom’s teeth- making her display her teeth as she told strangers how well her overbite had been fixed, and now my mom is obsessing about my teeth. I’m not mad, I’m glad she cares.

Teeth are so personal. They are so omnipresent in our consciousness when they are uncomfortable. The ironic thing is that I was blessed with really great teeth! They were white, they were cavity free, they were straight enough, but a series of small mistakes by dentists along the way has led to a situation like a bad hair cut where the hairdresser keeps cutting a little more off to even up the now way too short bangs, (or “fringe” for all my British readers (I like to pretend I have British readers).)

So pretty front teeth (I don’t want you to picture me all scraggly toothed) that don’t quite touch in the back, which is rather aggravating, especially after just spending $3000. Let us pray to the tooth fairy for pain free teeth that can chew, and a husband with Canadian citizenship.

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Free online writing courses!

Some of these look pretty fun, like this Advanced Essay Course at MIT:

Of course, that makes me long for an interesting discussion with everyone in the class, getting to know their personalities as they share their views, watching them develop as the class goes on, getting excited together as we learn new ideas… maybe I;ll try to find something face to face in my area.

Tags: writing, free, classes

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Last week I went for some bookstore therapy with a gift card in my wallet. I got some great books including “Finding Flow” by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (pronounced Chik-SENT-me-high-ee.) I find it to be a very encouraging book and it’s motivated me to get off my butookus and get some exercise the last few days. ChiksSENTmehighee also reassured me this morning as I woke up to my first newly unemployed Monday. He said that jobs are unsatisfying for three main reasons:

1. They are meaningless or worse yet, they put energy towards negative ends.
2. They are boring and tedious.
3. They are stressful, often as a result of negative interactions with peers and co-workers. 

My job was mildly positively meaningful, very boring and tedious, and I had good relationships with my co-workers and my boss.  I did what ChikSentmehighee recommends in the face of a boring job. I studied each step intensively. I made the process hugely more efficient which eventually halved the hours my job took. My old boss was very appreciative of all my extra energy and initiative and rewarded me with interesting projects to fill up my newly freed hours, and flexibility on the job, including letting me work flexible hours. I worked near the people I was serving, so I was also appreciated by the people I was near. My job was still only mildly meaningful and still somewhat dull, but I put energy into it and was appreciated. When my boss quit a few months ago. I was moved to a new department. My new boss didn’t seem to appreciate the high quality work I did and the extra energy I put into my work, but she was quite peeved when I didn’t “follow her directives” which included checking in with her before I left my office (???) and other ridiculous rules that didn’t have anything to do with how well I could do my job.  She rewarded my efficiency with more dull and boring work to fill up the hours. Just what I always wanted! And also rewarded my self-motivating and self-starting work ethic with closer supervision and more rules.  I was also in a separate building from my main “customers” so I didn’t work near people who knew that I worked from home a couple hours on my day off to make their lives easier. After trying to work out better working conditions for myself, and getting no helpfulness from my boss, I gave a heap load of notice, and quit without a new job already in place. People say I’m brave. I read about the possible reccesion over the weekend and thought that I may be very foolish. ChickSENTmehighee thinks I  made a good choice though. He says,

“Perhaps the only choice is to quit as quickly as possible even in the face of severe financial hardship. In terms of the bottom line of one’s life, it is always better to do something that one feels good about than something that may make us materially comfortable but emotionally miserable.” 

Sometimes it helps to see it in print.Wishing you a great day with an emotionally healthy bottom line! I’m off to have an unemployed adventure!

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I would love to have a space where people can gather and make art. I’d have supplies but mostly I’d just have a big space with a beautiful view. Can you picture it? There would be wooden tables, a couple big sinks, one wall would be mostly windows looking out over the ocean or a canyon, a vista of some kind, great natural light, people could come and go as they pleased. I don’t want to be in the business of stocking supplies so maybe I’d make an arrangement with some art supply stores, and people could also bring in their own supplies.

Doesn’t that sound like a great job? One of my favorite memories is being in art class in high school and working at yes, the wooden tables. Our teacher was kind and she let people who were cutting class hang out in her class. We did art projects and talked and laughed. I actually got some of my art in shows and my high school asked if they could keep one of my drawrings. They framed it and hung it up.

The picture was of a mountain biker and a snowboarder overlaid on top of each other. I saw the pictures in a magazine and superimposed the pictures over each other with the help of a projector. It looked kind of modern arty. I used crayons, markers, pen, and pencil.

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I got a goal workbook from a friend for Christmas. It looks like it will be very useful and I already started filling it out. I’m going to follow it up with a collage to keep me focused on my goals and to keep me inspired for the coming year.

You can download and print out the goal workbook here: www.tonyrobbins.com/pdfs/Momentum2006.pdf

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You give one charity $25 and before you know it, Anthony D. Romero from ACLU is writing you compelling donation letters. And you can say to the letter, “Look, I know I donated to you once, but I just quit my job and Christmas is coming up.” To which Anthony responds,

“At the heart of our work together is a fundamental struggle in our nation that pits confidence and optimism against fear and insecurity.”"Well, that is intriguing, Anthony. I mean, you’ve obviously really thought about this. you’re getting to the heart of the matter. I completely agree. But, like I said, I’m running on soon to be broke mode, so…. good luck to you.”

Then, with his deep, dark brown eyes, Anthony looks deep into mine and says, “I’m urging you today to make a year-end donation to the ACLU as a personal reflection of you commitment to the confident, determined, and hopeful spirit that are fundamental to protecting and advancing freedom.” (emphasis his)

“Wow, Anthony, how did you know I’m committed to a hopeful spirit and to advancing freedom? I really am. It’s like, we’re so.. sympatico… But, look, I just can’t give you a donation right now with a cheerful heart, which is my way, but I can write about this on my blog and maybe give you wider exposure to a richer audience…” (Now I feel a little guilty, he doesn’t know how few people read my blog.)

I think he’s disappointed, but Anthony has class, “Thank you for all you have done to defend freedom in this especially challenging period - and for the leadership I know you will continue to offer as we move freedom forward in 2008.”

No, thank you, Anthony. Thank you for your optimism and your clarity and your determination, thank you.

PS: As a bonus just for Anthony, here is a link to an article about Naomi Wolf’s new book which lists the ten steps that people use to turn democracies into dictatorships: 10 steps to dictatorship

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I want to be a Galavanting Monkey and marry someone with deep goodness in his family roots. Pretty much, that is the main thing I want to create in this life: a clan with deep goodness at it’s roots. LOTS of love.

Hmmm…. Maybe I should change this site to “Also a Gallavanting Monkey” “Gallavanting Monkey in Training”, “Soon to be a Gallavanting Monkey.”

Yesterday I ate a bag of M & M’s and then immediately afterwards, I had a cold. I didn’t have a cold, I was perfectly fine, I ate a normal size bag of M & M’s, I did have a cold.

Today I am practicing the art of forgiveness. My boss is giving me grief for leaving early yesterday. I want to be self-righteous in my head, but (here is the forgiveness) she is only doing her job. I should also practice truth. Here is the truth: I left because the equation of “nothing left to do today” plus, “have to walk down to my car and put more quarters in the meter” plus “my last day is soon, what are they going to do, fire me?” plus “It’s 2:00 and I haven’t had a chance to have lunch yet” all added up in my head to: walk down to my car, but don’t put coins in the meter, just drive home and eat lunch there, ’cause I have nothing left to do today and what are they going to do, fire me?

Where o where could the self-righteousness come in, you say? Well, I’m home sick today and still checking my work email and I called a Prof. to help her with her grading even though I will not get paid for my helping hours at home. So, I guess I feel like I am a good worker if not a good employee because I do get the job done and I don’t want to inconvenience anybody.

Bonus of the day: I’ve never actually talked to this particular prof. and she has an Australian accent! It really goes well with the blog I tore myself away from to call her! Also her name is Jenny which is cute and also she was really nice, which is cute, especially when I have a cold.

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Thoughts:

* I have a computer like Carrie Bradshaw now! I saw Sex and the City tonight and when I got home I came over to write about my day just like she does on the show and I realized that I have a little desk with a little laptop on it just like she does in the show! Yay! And I don’t know what all I am, but one thing I definately am is a writer. It’s one of the answers to the question about what passion is right under my nose.

* People are wonderful: I’ve been listening to NPR and listening to these little blurbs about people who are doing good in their little areas of the world and it’s making me feel less like I have to figure out some plan to save the whole world and more like I can just do the good I can and that we can all save the world together. Of course, people are bad too, today I listened to senators or representatives grilling a general about torturing people using water boarding. Water boarding! Our country! Where the hell am I living!? It is so sad. But they were calling his bullshit- democrats and republicans alike. Good job, guys. And a law student is translating for an American man being held at Guantanamo- held for 5 years with no charges. Our government- taking people away in the night and holding them without charges, and torturing them. Um… this started out positive… and I guess the positive thing is, the horror is horrible but what surprises me more is how powerful we all are collectively and that we can really shift the direction of our world. We can have the world we want. We really do have the power when we just step in and do the good we can.

* I was walking on the beach the other day and I had a lovely thought- I imagined us collectively reaching up, taking the military helicopter flying above me, and gently setting it on the ground.

I didn’t have a chance to talk to my mom, so things to tell my mom if she is reading this:

* You would be so proud of me, I was assertive at the dentist even though they were in a hurry and was able to get information from them to make some good decisions.

In other uplifting news:
* I flipped through a book that I bought awhile ago. The author asked, “What’s your next big thing?” and it took the pressure off of me taking my next “career” move so seriously and made it seem more like an adventure.

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It’s amazing to me how there is so much wisdom lost and then it becomes new again. Face exercises work! And weight lifting helps you lose weight.

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Only 9:11 and I’m crying already. I had to close the door to my office. I’m not crying about work though, I’m crying about my roommate telling me that “we are opposite in so many ways” and the implied meaning that I am not her favorite person in the world, and the how that ties in to the pattern that seems to be happening lately of me getting rejected (ejected?) from my old life.

I went from being valued at work and getting good reviews (while my old boss was here) to being disapproved of, undervalued, and feeling bad enough about it to quit. At church, I went from feeling like a part of a loving community to leaving due to actions of our lead minister and staff. Many other young adults left as well, and I left, no one kicked me out, but I still feel rejected/ejected. Also, there has been some kind of shift in my social circle and I feel like I am on the edge in some ways instead of in the middle where I like to be.

Today on the bus I imagined how I would feel if everybody approved of me. It would be such a nice feeling- I could relax and just be myself. I really take how much/many people approve of me as a measure of how well I’m doing as a person sometimes. I thought about it as I was walking from the bus to work, and I couldn’t shake the idea that if more people approved of me, it would mean that I really am better, I really am more ok.

Then I thought of my aunt, who I am a lot alike, and how much I enjoy her, how fantastic I think she is. My other aunt, her sister, often disapproves of her. She thinks she is too messy, too soft, not together enough etc… And when my aunt is around her sister, she does suddenly seem kind of bumbling, somewhat simpering, and whiny. But when I’m with her, she is hilarious, exuberant, smart, interesting, funny, and gorgeous. She is messy, but she is glorious, who cares!

I love both my aunts, and from the outside it is easy to see that my aunt who disapproves is just that way and that her disapproval is all about her preferences and ways of looking at the world. She is cleaner, more direct, more of the things we think of as “together” in our society. So? That’s her deal. My roommate has a similar personality to that aunt and I don’t disapprove of her, but I think she disapproves of me. I’ve been trying to get her approval, and I’m going to try to stop trying. It’s easier to see, looking at the mirror of my aunts, how any disapproval she feels for me is her own deal. It doesn’t mean I’m bad, and if I got her approval, it wouldn’t mean I’d be any better.

I have been disapproving of me lately. Aye, maybe thar’s the rub. Goal for today: list a few things I would feel proud of myself for, and do them.

12/12/07 Update: I have been feeling guilty for writing that my aunt disaproves of my other aunt and that my roommate disaproves of me. Maybe they don’t! guilty, guilty, guilty…arggh… just remember, reality is multi-faceted and it changes, and… did I mention that I like my other aunt and my roommate, and it says more about my state of mind than any objective truth about them, but I think you got that.

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Sorry, I guess you shouldn’t really get to say that it’s “the longest 12 days ever” unless you are in prison or waiting for a test result from the doctor to come back or something. I am just a whiny, disgruntled employee.

You know, sometimes complaining makes me feel worse, but I just spent lunch complaining about bad management and I feel much better and more justified now. I started out lunch slumped on the bench we were eating at, with sort of a glassy stare, and my mouth slightly open. I said my standard spiel about why I’m leaving to my friend from the same university I work at, and she heartily agreed that we have bad management and that’s when the tide really started turning for me energy wise. I especially liked talking about the specific ineptness of our bad managers management, mostly micro-management and mis-management, and then there is the more sympathy provoking obviously in over their heads management.

On the way back to work, walking jauntily in the crisp, sunny air, I saw a woman from my office.  I told her when my last day is and she said, “Good for you!” She is a manager who is nice to her employees and she said my boss seemed really hard to work for. I said, yes, she is an absolute bitch. Just kidding, I was very honest and fair. I said she was not a good fit for me but some of her other employees seemed to like her. Then I said, I still think she’s a butt-wipe though. Just kidding, I didn’t say that.

PS: Knowing that I was going to write a countdown post really helped me decide to come to work today.

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14 more days to go until the Christmas holiday. Since I have worked several hours from home during the past few weeks without getting paid for it, I am giving myself guilt free time to do my own stuff today. (OK, maybe I feel a little guilt.)

Yesterday I had a dentist appointment. I need nearly $5000 worth of work done. Dang, it takes a lot of energy (in the form of money) to care for one little being’s teeth.  They are being super helpful and scheduling me in for all my work while I still have insurance.

Which leads me to the answer to Laura’s question: no- I do not have a job lined up. It just got to the point that the risk of remaining in the bud was too odious to my soul.  It remains to be seen if I will blossom. (Ack! I’m getting nervous about the leap I’m taking.)

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I quit my job. I gave them about two and a half month’s notice because four other people quit right before me and I didn’t want to leave them in the lurch. I’ve been calling in sick a lot because sometimes I just can’t stand going in. (There is a reason all those other people quit. There has been a huge amount of turn over in a year and a half. Is the message getting through to them yet???)

Everyday feels like a new level of humiliation. Ok, it’s not that horrible. I mean, they pay me. I get to take a lunch break (ususally.) I get to surf the internet when I’m not busy. I will take advantage of that during the next 15 work days.

My goal: go in to work each and every day during the next 15 work days. I can do it. I can do it. Right? I’m going to document the horror- the banal horror of it all- each day, so I don’t have to suffer alone.

Warning: a lot of complaining to come, self-justification, and a heaping dollop of whining.

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Hi, You hab nice bacation? Oh .. you go to nother city? That’s good. How long? two weeks? That’s good.

I heard you’re looking for a new place?

Why? You found something? Oh let me tell you. The old owner, she die. Now her children, one in Austin, one in Santa Monica, they sell house. People come and look, but no one buy. Is good for me. [looks up] please just one more month, two! No one buy, too expensive! Two million! Old house! But beautiful view, That’s why. Two million! One for him, one for her. I get tired of counting one, one, one, oh too much money I have in my purse! I lost track! Million, never work again.

Oh, daughter, she no eat. She not hungry. She only smoke, oh and drink black coffee. Smoke in one hand, coffee in other. And she have… beer. but no eat. I say, you want some food. She say, no Ester, no. She sits with her head in her hand, like this, poor baby. Poor baby! I try and help. I say, I do some laundry for you? She say, thank you ester. I have pajamas and my bedding. I say, OK.

Her mother, I help her. She die in March, just 4 days, she be 100. 100! She beautiful! Her face, beautiful, and so sweet. She intelligent. books! books, books, books, But her memory gone. She say only, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. She look a person up all the way down to feet, up! ba, ba, ba, ba bery intelligent, first woman scientist here. I put my hand (she puts her hand on my shoulder) and she [she puts her hand on her shoulder and presses her face against it.] like this. Oh bery sweet.

Daughter look more old!

Nother surprise! Almost 100. No poo poo pee pee in pants. No. Never! Before she die, poo poo 4 times in bed, but never before that. She just uh uh, and I help like this to bathroom, take pants down, I say you up now? unh unh! No, she poo poo. Never diaper! Never! And her face, pink, and she take…[she motions]

earrings and necklace?

yeah, she take and put everyday, here, here, and I close lid. So sweet. I put my hand (she puts her hand on my shoulder) and she [she puts her hand on her shoulder and presses her face against it.] like this. Oh bery sweet.

So, I bery sad. I come out of my house. I live behind. I see the big house, I think oh, Margaret, my baby! But she 100. That’s too much. So, life.

But, no emergency. Maybe soon. You let me know. you tell people, Ester, she’s honest. She’s responsible.

Now, I look for job in the afternoon. I have my son, he’s in graduate school, and my daughter, she In graduate school, and I try to help out. I need one more job. I clean house, but now, I’m tired. They say, oh Ester, I don’t need cleaning today. I say, call, say no need. Gas is too expensive. I call and say, you need cleaning, say oh, my son and husband gone, not today, Ester.

My partner gone today, so I clean all the buildings, up, down. The worst is the classrooms and bathrooms on the first floor. Oh. today, throw up everywhere. in the sink, on the floor. the poo poo here, there, there. oh. Someone write in poo poo on mirror! Oh… I cry. not angry just, I try and make look so nice. oh. I think public can get in down there, maybe not someone from here.

Well, with job here I leave at 1 1:30, nice! So, I look for nother job. You hear? You tell, Ester honest, Ester responsible. I need more money, well, everybody need more money! But, now I think, Ester need more money!

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…consider that all those calculations of what is “in my interest” and what will benefit me and what I can “afford” grow tiresome. When we live rightly, decision by decision, the heart sings even when the rational mind disagrees and the ego protests. Besides, human wisdom is limited. Despite our machinations, we are ultimately unsuccessful at avoiding pain, loss and death. For animals, plants, and humans alike, there is more to life than not dying.

- Charles Eisenstein

This is the tail end of an article about the ethics of eating meat. He argues that it’s ethical because we are all going to die and the real question is how the animal was treated while it was alive. I admire vegetarians and feel like a hyporite when I meat, because I sure as hell don’t want someone to eat me! But, I still eat meat. I just haven’t managed to find a way to feel healthy and energetic without it. I eat meat less often than I used to and I’m down to birds and seafood. i think every little bit helps.

This article promted me to decide to take another step. I will work towards only eating farm raised or hunted creatures rather than factory raised creatures. I already only eat farm raised free range eggs and highly encourage you to do so as well. (More ethical and all you have to give up is a few more cents.) I do encourage you to buy your eggs from a local farmer if you have the chance as the label “free range” in the grocery store has a variety of meanings.

The article can be found here.

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I’m starting to think about politics. It’s a sore spot after Kerry’s loss in the last election and the complete ineptitude of the current administration.
I just read The Clinton Surprise, an article defending Hillary Clinton’s “electability.” I haven’t researched the candidates that much, but I like Clinton because I have a feeling that she is competent. Here is one of the comments about the article:

I would add only one thing. It seems to me voters are looking for something that transcends any discussion of gender. More than anything, we desire competence in our next president.

Elite media insiders like Tucker Carlson tried to foist a shallow, Beltway-approved “story-line” about Hillary Clinton upon the American public. Instead, Clinton’s obvious competence trumped the story line, and the talking heads are spluttering. The American public is pleasantly surprised to see a candidate who is well-versed on all policy issues. Furthermore, people can see she is a quick thinker on her feet. The debates validated that point. She knows her stuff and she has great problem-solving skills. What’s not to like?

Hillary is the girl who no one likes that much, but everyone wants on their research team because they know she will do most of the work and bring in an A grade for the entire team. Unlike the 2000 election, no one needs to have a beer with the next president. Voters simply want a person who can do a good job running the country.

— Posted by Dave Baldwin

I don’t know if Hillary is the most competent, but after the bungled policy these last 8 years, competence is definitely the clincher for me, and I do think she is smart and I think her husband is smart.

On the other hand, from the little I know about Clinton, I already know I don’t agree with all of her policies. I like free trade and think that the market is going to be global and many kinds of jobs are going to be out sourced unless we try and stop it, and I don’t think we should try and stop it. I think we should deal with it. It is going to raise the quality of life in other countries and more open trade can be good for us if we have a system where it is safe to be a problem solver- a lucrative skill that can’t always be outsourced. So, I disagree with protectionism, which I think she promotes. I think that our job market will be most robust when it is safe for people to be innovative. One thing that will make it safe is if there is health care for everyone. Then you can more safely leave your job and actually contribute in a meaningful way that can’t be outsourced. So, I agree with a good health care plan, which I hear she is for. :)

What about you?

What is most important to you?

Do you know yet who you think has the traits/skills/experience that are most important to you?

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