exercise

As you may have noticed, if you check in here regularly, I’m in a process of deciding what money making projects I want to focus my energy on.

Here is a video bio of a health and exercise trainer named Alana Mann. In this video she talks about her journey towards her current theories about health. I love how she reveals the deeper values that are driving her career choices towards the end of the video. She says, “It’s my opinion that the world needs more strong and empowered women to really heal her.”

Click here to get to Alana’s website Origins of Energy.

Things I would love to know:

What are the underlying values driving your choices? Is it something you notice? Is it important to you that your choices match your deepest values? If so, how do you keep your values in mind while you make your everyday choices?

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YES! Fitness and percentage of fatness may correlate but they are not the same thing. No, my friend, they are not. If you are one of those fat prejudiced people and you justify your judgment by saying that people who are fat are being unhealthy, it is time to stop that right now! Check out this new research that I found in Kathy Smith’s blog:

———–
“There was a lot of buzz this past week about a new study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association. Turns out fitness may trump fatness when it comes to living longer. In other words, it’s better to be fit and fat than to be at a normal weight and out of shape.

“I can’t tell you how happy this news makes someone like me. I feel like I’ve known this my whole life, but never really had the scientific proof to back it up. I’ve watched thousands of people shape up and experience medical transformations without necessarily reaching a weight most would call “slim.””
———-

Another note to any fat prejudiced people: Even if all people who have more fat on their bodies than you are comfortable with are unhealthy, that still does not give you an excuse to be rude, judgmental, or think that you are superior. You’re not!

(If you want to shift out of judgment: instead of thinking something along the lines of: “they shouldn’t be fat,” Try something along the lines of, “I prefer to be at about 15% body fat. That is my strong preference for myself. Other people can make different choices.” Check out this article by Steve Andreas for an in depth look at shaking the black hole of judgment.)

Sorry for the angry lecture, everyone else, the fact that some people think that fat prejudice is still acceptable really burns my tootsies.

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Last week I went for some bookstore therapy with a gift card in my wallet. I got some great books including “Finding Flow” by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (pronounced Chik-SENT-me-high-ee.) I find it to be a very encouraging book and it’s motivated me to get off my butookus and get some exercise the last few days. ChiksSENTmehighee also reassured me this morning as I woke up to my first newly unemployed Monday. He said that jobs are unsatisfying for three main reasons:

1. They are meaningless or worse yet, they put energy towards negative ends.
2. They are boring and tedious.
3. They are stressful, often as a result of negative interactions with peers and co-workers. 

My job was mildly positively meaningful, very boring and tedious, and I had good relationships with my co-workers and my boss.  I did what ChikSentmehighee recommends in the face of a boring job. I studied each step intensively. I made the process hugely more efficient which eventually halved the hours my job took. My old boss was very appreciative of all my extra energy and initiative and rewarded me with interesting projects to fill up my newly freed hours, and flexibility on the job, including letting me work flexible hours. I worked near the people I was serving, so I was also appreciated by the people I was near. My job was still only mildly meaningful and still somewhat dull, but I put energy into it and was appreciated. When my boss quit a few months ago. I was moved to a new department. My new boss didn’t seem to appreciate the high quality work I did and the extra energy I put into my work, but she was quite peeved when I didn’t “follow her directives” which included checking in with her before I left my office (???) and other ridiculous rules that didn’t have anything to do with how well I could do my job.  She rewarded my efficiency with more dull and boring work to fill up the hours. Just what I always wanted! And also rewarded my self-motivating and self-starting work ethic with closer supervision and more rules.  I was also in a separate building from my main “customers” so I didn’t work near people who knew that I worked from home a couple hours on my day off to make their lives easier. After trying to work out better working conditions for myself, and getting no helpfulness from my boss, I gave a heap load of notice, and quit without a new job already in place. People say I’m brave. I read about the possible reccesion over the weekend and thought that I may be very foolish. ChickSENTmehighee thinks I  made a good choice though. He says,

“Perhaps the only choice is to quit as quickly as possible even in the face of severe financial hardship. In terms of the bottom line of one’s life, it is always better to do something that one feels good about than something that may make us materially comfortable but emotionally miserable.” 

Sometimes it helps to see it in print.Wishing you a great day with an emotionally healthy bottom line! I’m off to have an unemployed adventure!

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It’s amazing to me how there is so much wisdom lost and then it becomes new again. Face exercises work! And weight lifting helps you lose weight.

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* Eat whatever I want to whenever I want to.
* Don’t eat anything I don’t want to. (I just discovered this one.)

* Only exercise if I feel like exercising.
* If I feel like moving, let myself move! (I just discovered this one!)

These decisions are about noticing how I feel and completely trusting that what I want to do is alright. What would taste good to me? What do I really want right now? Do I want to lay in bed for an hour, or go on a walk in the park, or take a long hot shower, or do an exercise tape I haven’t done in years and then stop after 14 minutes, or go running and then sprint on some blocks juse for fun?

It’s a huge leap of faith! You mean, I could just eat whatever I want to?? Really? Me? :) And still be alive and stuff? And not weigh 300 pounds and stuff?

You mean, I could just, like, exercise when I want to?? And then like, lay around or dance in my living room if I want to? Like I’m just some kind of animal? ;)

Here I am deciding to let myself eat whatever I desire and move when, if and how I desire to. (Sounds very hedonistic no? Scary to inner puritan, no?) When I first made the decision to NEVER DIET AGAIN, about 2 years ago, I ate hot pockets everyday for about a month. Then I went through a licorice phase. I gained 25 pounds!

And then I eventually, blessedly, stopped obsessing about food.

I stopped eating more than I wanted to at parties because I knew, but really knew that I could eat more later if I felt like it. I stopped finishing all my chips if I wasn’t in the mood for chips, because I knew, I mean really knew that I could have more chips if ever I wanted to. I mean, it is amazingly freeing to stop obsessing about food. You of the long time dieters know how much brain energy goes into thinking about food. Imagine my relief.

You know which countries don’t have more depressed woman than men? The countries where women don’t diet.

But! You say, I don’t want to gain 25 pounds and have my arteries clogged with hot pockets! I know, I know, me neither. But I was even more sick of dieting or even being hyper alert about eating “healthy.” I made a full committment to never diet again whatever the results, and the results were not leading to many health goals at first, but strangely, I think this process of following my desires has now led me on a journey of having health and energy. Tune in tomorrow for the super secret of my success. Wait, that sounds too cheeky. Tune in tomorrow for the super secrets of my ordinary life of being fairly healthy and freeing up my brain to think about whatever I want to think about!

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So, lately I’ve been inordinately proud of my breasts. This is not like me. I was not one of those little girls who was waiting to blossom. I liked my streamlined, pragmatic, asexual body. Even recently, as boasts about my burgeoning bosom have surfaced unplanned like Freudian slips, I’ve clung to the idea that I’m a 36 C. You see, I am a person who likes elegance in design, where form follows function. And even though people might not guess it to look at my outerwear, I have very specific tastes. My bras don’t look fancy, but they fit perfectly, and I pride myself on this kind of elegance. All my bras are the exact same bra- Olga, with a flower in the middle, 36 C, minimizer bras. They fit perfectly. And then suddenly, they didn’t. Something looked wrong. My nipples were showing through my shirts. It was time for a change, and I finally had to admit that I had hot-pocketed my way right into a D cup. My bras look enormous now. When I brought home a new one, my roommate exclaimed, “That could fit on my head!” It reminded me of a Designing Women episode when the red head was the keeper of the busty brunette’s bra and she put it on her head. I haven’t reached Delta Burke status yet, but I do have an abundance of flesh. It seems almost overindulgant.

As I stood in the dressing room with my bouncy breast tissue held aloft like it was on a tray, and my toddler-like belly protruding defiantly, I thought, “Have I gone too far?” Is this reveling in all this butter contributed fat and flesh too much? Should I kick into streamline phase, build up my muscles and melt all this delicious fat off my body? Then what would I do with all the new clothes I’m buying?!” I turned and looked at myself from the side. If I jut my stomach out and make it taught in instead of jiggly, I could look pregnant. I will make a darn cute pregnant woman. Then I wondered if the old tautology was true: To get pregnant, one must not already look pregnant… Nah… Who wouldn’t want to revel in all this extra bouncy flesh with me. My rolling thighs and protruding belly look just as cute on me as they do on a toddler, right? And even though I don’t understand the sexual allure of breasts, I know that some people do.

I think my current pride in my girth is the closest I’ve come to understanding some men’s pride in their package. It’s like a female version of machismo. Well, we’ll see where all this intuitive eating and moving leads me. I’m never going back to forcing myself to eat crappola again. I’m not eating on an eating plan. I’m not running 36 thousand miles, or even 36 if I don’t want to. I am going to keep buying clothes that I like for my body as it is now. I can always put them in a box when my body changes. I don’t know why I thought I had to get my body to one specific place and try and keep it there. A woman’s body changes so much in her life, and if I have my way, it’s going to change a lot more in the coming years, and I won’t have to pretend I’m pregnant. I can have a box of clothes for different future sizes. I have room in my life for my changing body, and these DKNY jeans I’m wearing are going to make excellent early maternity jeans. So, I guess I don’t have to worry about losing my breasts to exercise. They’ll come back eventually, taught with expectation, like my toddler belly.

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Back in 2003 I finally did the exercises in What Color is Your Parachute. I had a list of exactly what I wanted and no idea what kind of job would have those characteristics. It felt awesome to feel clear about my wants though. Because I had such clarity, when I heard about my grad program, I was able to make a quick decision. Now that I’m going to graduate, I need to clarify again. It’s hard for me to stop in the middle of all my life tasks and do the neccesary writing and thinking to get clear. It feels like it will take too much time and I need to HURRY and LOOK FOR A JOB. (panic, panic.) However, I know from experience that being really clear about what I want will speed my search up. Ok, deep breath, calm down and go write…

What Should I Do With My Life?

…you’ll be a lot happier if you aren’t fighting the value system around you. Find one that enforces a set of beliefs that you can really get behind. There’s a powerful transformative effect when you surround yourself with like-minded people.

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Your Superpower and Your Kryptonite, a great article over on Starling Fitness reminded me of this poem:

You do not have to be good.

You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.

You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.

Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.

Meanwhile the world goes on.

Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes, over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers.

Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination, calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting—over and over announcing your place in the family of things.

Mary Oliver

I first found this poem at a website which offers poems to different Enneagram types. (The enneagram is a personality typing system.) I just typed a line into google and found it again on a UU website! Go UU’s! The exercises there will be a good match with the questions on Laura’s site.

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I’ve been talking about bodywork a lot lately. It’s because I had a truly convincing experience of the power movement has to transform all aspects of myself. It all started with this free online class. I didn’t finish the class, but I did the exercise from the first week consistently. All I did was bend over in the touching-your-toes position, and hold my elbows with my hands for 5 minutes. After this uber simple stretch, I walked differently, perceived differently and felt differently. It was amazing. What Erich Schiffmann said in Yoga about how moving your body differently makes your life different didn’t seem esoteric after that experience. Try it for yourself. Here are two experiments you can do:

1. Go on a walk. Notice what you notice. Do the stretch I mentioned above for 5 minutes a day for a week. Go on a walk. Notice what you notice.

2. (This one requires a friend.) Both of you look at something, a picture or a view, and notice what you notice. Then you follow the other person on a 12 minute or longer walk. Walk behind them but at an angle so you can notice what they are looking at. Walk exactly like they are walking, hold your body in the posture they hold their body in, look at what they look at, touch what they touch. Be just like them. Come back to the picture or view you looked at before and notice what you notice. Switch roles and repeat. The effect of this exercise is especially noticeable if you partner with someone who is a lot different than you are.

If you do either of these exercises, you will learn a lot about how you perceive and how you can alter your perceptions. If you do exercise number 2, you will also learn a lot about your partner. Let me know what you find out!

Categories | Well Being

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Remember when I was going to tell you all about my plans for my Summer of Inner Transformation? I had actually already written down a complete plan, but instead of my plans, tonight I’ll tell you about my synchronicities.

I was offered 10 free sessions of Somatic bodywork (I don’t know what it is either) from a classmate in one of my NIA classes. Tonight in NIA, our teacher ended the class with Feldenkrais exercises. I felt so different as I started walking after the excercises, lighter but heavier- more connected to the floor. Then our teacher mentioned that she teaches a class in a neighborhood near mine. It’s only $10 a class. I’m going to do it. Tonight I got a haircut which is outer transformation, but ya’ll know it’s inner transformation too. I have CURLY hair and the last (EXPENSIVE) hair cut I got was a mess. I got this haircut as a trade. Rock on, craigslist.

I finished my CD! It took several hours of work for several days in the recording studio and it has 5 songs and totals 12 minutes! Phew! It was fun. Now I’ve restrung my guitar and am waiting for the strings to settle in. Woo! :) I heard about a group starting the Artist’s Way journey and I jumped on the bandwagon. I think it’s just what I need. I’ve been a slacker on my Morning Pages for the last couple of days. How do all you working parents do it?

Categories | My Life, Well Being, Health, Beauty, Links

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Yes, revere me. Less than a year ago at this time I could run 20 miles. I rock. I still rock even though running 3 miles would be have my lungs aching at this point. Once you run a marathon you rock indefinately. That is the glory of the marathon. Lisa Watts apparently made that running thing a habit.

When I started running in my twenties, the exercise suited and soothed me. Out on the road, breathing hard, I could burn up my frustrations and sort out my questions. Years have passed, but I keep running. In hectic times, it grounds me. In wary, uncertain times, the miles sometimes point the way to some solution or relief.

Read the ten spiritual life lessons that running taught Lisa Watts.
Thanks to Laura at Starling Fitness for the link.

Categories: My Life, Unitarian Universalism, Well Being, Health, Links

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Umm.. yes, while it’s true that it’s good to love yourself and if you don’t you might self-sabotage (see last post,) self sabotage can also be healthy! I forgot about that until today when I was listening to a CD of my old NLP instructor Nick Le Force. He reminded me that if you try and make a change that does not meet the needs of all parts of yourself, you might self-sabotage. You’ve got to consider ECOLOGY! Resistance may be an important signal to you that there are other important factors you need to consider as you create your goal.

Here is some web-based advice to deal with self-sabotage. John David Hoag writes about ecology issues that come up when creating goals:

“What do you want?” isn’t always easy to answer. We may have conflicting thoughts or feelings about it. We might welcome help to resolve an important issue. But beneath our desire for help we might not be entirely sure we want the issue resolved. It might be a sort of “inner secret” for us, even to ourselves. This is called an “ecology issue” in NLP. Unlike traditional therapy which calls it “resistance,” NLP doesn’t minimize or pathologize it. In NLP we understand that it is precisely those ecology issues that are the keys to unlocking new realms of potential. Before any change can take place — and reaching a goal is a change — resolving a problem is a change — the ecology must be attended to. Otherwise, we’ll be going nowhere fast on the road to our desired outcome. Our ecology issues can stop us — because they’re so important.

So, how do we figure out what those conflicting thoughts/feelings/needs are? Laura Moncur at Starling Fitness recommends writing it out, so does Sraightforward Coaching:

If you find yourself struggling to manifest a goal you have set yourself, try this exercise* to discover the hidden fears, beliefs and values that might be holding you back: write down all the reasons why you DON’T want that goal in your life. Let your darkest thoughts surrounding your goal reveal themselves on paper and keep writing until you can’t come up with any more. These are some of the fears, beliefs and consequences surrounding your goal or decision and they might include the one(s) that are holding you back. Once they are all out in the open, you may find some issues you need to work through before you are ready to achieve your target. Reframing or redefining your goal to address the conflicting value or belief could also work to integrate the goal with your personal ecology.

After asking yourself some good questions, NLP Weekly recommends giving yourself time:

Let the questions sink in.
Write them in your journal (you do have a journal, right?).
Read them before bed time and wait for answers.
You’ll get dreams, songs, words, flashes, memories, voices… don’t ignore them. It’s important to notice, note and acknowledge. Your brain doesn’t like keeping riddles unsolved.
Asking good questions and giving it time to find the answers with no pressure, is one the greatest talents you can develop.

Reading and thinking about ecology reminded me, once again, how important it is to treat myself kindly. If part of me is protesting, (which shows up in my weight loss goals as eating fattening food I don’t even want,) then instead of dragging those protesting parts of myself kicking and screaming, I can attend to myself, (listen!) and do my best to meet all my needs, address my concerns, and calm my fears. As you know, those protesting parts are hard to ignore. You might as well turn to them and say, “So, what do you want, anyway?”

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Keeping your body healthy is an expression of gratitude to the whole cosmos - the trees, the clouds, everything.

-Thich Nhat Hanh

I was just reminded of how great Laura Moncur’s fitness blog is. Head on over to Starling Fitness and check it out. I read every article in the Motivation section. As I read about her internal struggles- the thoughts, the self-sabotage, I thought, there is no point in trying to trick myself into exercising because, until I wholly love and accept myself, there will always be some part of me that self-sabotages. Now I also remember that besides telling myself that I love myself, another way for me to understand that I am worthy of love and care is to show myself. One way to show myself that I love and care about myself is to eat healthy foods and do healthy exercise.

More tips for treating yourself like you are worthy of love and care:

• Buck societal trends: Reward yourself for what you do, not how you look. In fitness goals that translates to: consider yourself a success when you take actions towards your fitness goals, whatever the result on the scale.

• Be kind to yourself in little ways. Are you sitting in an uncomfortable position? Shift your body now, stretch, breathe deeply. Let yourself feel comfortable physically.

• Remember what activities you enjoy. Make doing activities you enjoy a priority in your life! If you love painting and think you don’t have time for the full blown hobby, take some time today to do a small sketch. Even giving yourself a little of what you love is a kindness. It’s better to give yourself something today than to withhold from yourself until you can have it perfectly.

• Don’t wait until you think you deserve love to be kind to yourself. Has anyone ever loved you unconditionally before? It’s time someone does. You can be that someone.

• If you have trouble unconditionally loving yourself… don’t get down on yourself for that! You can always step out one level from your current thoughts and acknowledge your thoughts or behavior and say “ok, I acknowledge that.” Sometimes it’s not the thought or behavior itself that hurts, but the meta-thought you have about it. For example, if you feel depressed just notice how you feel and avoid adding an additional layer of hatred, blame or guilt for what you are feeling. If you feel fat, just notice that, love yourself anyway and avoid adding an additional layer of anger or guilt or self-hatred. I think that is part of what “Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional” means.

Didn’t I start this entry by talking about fitness motivation? What does all this self-love talk have to do with that? Well, if you want to get fit, and then you create a plan, and then you follow that plan, probably nothing. BUT if you want to get fit, and then create a plan, and then you… try to do it and sometimes do it, but sometimes buy yourself donuts (or potato chips or…) even as another part of you is screaming ”NO!!”, or some part of you refuses to go running even though you know you‘d feel better if you did, or you lose weight and then freak out when someone gives you a compliment then… you may have a little self-sabotage going on. One way to deal with the self-sabatoger is to love the little bugger. Hug the dragon. As all of you is loved (by you,) you (all of you) will want what is best for you, because you will know/feel you are worthy of the best.

So, practice unconditionally loving yourself so you can be of one accord, want to be healthy, create a healthy plan, and simply follow it. In the meantime, use some of Laura’s motivation suggestions and gently drag yourself out to excercise. Be a good parent to yourself, and with all the kindness and compassion you can muster tell yourself, “I’m doing this because I love you, you’ll thank me when you’re older.”

For another look at positive self-talk,check out Norm Ephraim’s article.

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I read this ad on craigslist today. (I know, I told myself I wouldn’t read those ads anymore! It’s pre-exercise procrastination!) This woman’s ad is deliciously acerbic. (Yes, I read the women’s ads too!)

Reply to: anonymous
Date: 2005-02-17, 7:40AM PST

I have written an ad on Craigslist before. I realize now I was not specific enough about what I DON’T so here it is. (Please don’t get your feelings hurt if you don’t fit the criteria—there’s someone for everyone!)

What I don’t want.

If you are over 35, this is not the personal ad for you. . Even if you “look young for your age.” Or people “mistake you for younger.” Also if you are under 24 I am not looking for a younger man , even if you “act mature beyond your years.” No thanks.

If you still live at home, are just down on your luck, are waiting for such and such break, —maybe Godot, or even if your new band is really going to take off soon,—I don’t want to hear it. I can’t date who you plan to be. I stopped banking on someone’s potential a long time ago.

Judgmental? Lazy? Jealous? If you are not nice I am not interested. I want someone who is a good person, even when no one is looking.

If you are ugly I probably won’t be attracted to you. I am good looking, and ugly doesn’t really go with goodlooking;) Or really short, I am not short, so it just wouldn’t work out if I wore high heels. . I like guys who are good looking and tall—if you are questioning whether you are good looking or tall —you probably aren’t.. If people look away when you smile that is not a good sign either.

If the last time you were at the gym was sometime in the Clinton Admin we will not mesh. If your idea of working out is switching the channel a couple of times on a Sunday, every Sunday I won’t waste my time with you. I am looking for someone who can keep up with me in outdoor…. and INDOOR sports.

If you are in recovery I can’t deal with it. Attending weekly meetings for your addiction? If after your name you say I am a oholic anything move on… I applaud your effort for getting your life together —-but I am not looking to date you.

Dependency is so unappealing. Take anything to make you happy daily? Is your mood enhanced by one of the many doctor prescribed meds? You are not for me. I am a firm believer that life is full of ups and downs—you take both—and when you are down, do something you love, get out and move. Dependency is so unappealing.

If you have no friends or hobbies. Passionless people bore me, what will we talk about if you have nothing going on???

So that is what I want. Let’s meet for a drink and see if I am what you want.
Pic for Pic.
I look forward to reading the three emails I will receive.

Ahhh… that feels good.

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A couple days ago my Grandma, her sister, and my aunt were talking about how they wish they hadn’t been so scared when they were my age, and had followed their true dreams and passions. My aunt wanted to be an actess, but took the safe road and became a teacher. I want to sing in a band, and this year my goal is to perform in public often. During the last week in January, I plan to perform at an open mike. (Ackk! Do you know how scary that is for me??!! I was shaking just singing into the phone for my audio blog!) I am also going to exercise 5 days a week and eat healthy food. I’ve gotten a good start on that one.

My main goal of the year is to enjoy my life. To do that I am practicing gratitude and appreciation. Do you have any gratitude or appreciation practices that you want to share?

I will finish my master’s degree by the end of the year. What I really, really want to do in my career is to create a prototype of an invention I have an idea for, research it, and have somebody else pay for this- either in the form of a scholarship for a doctorate or a grant. This is my big passion and and I haven’t figured out how to chunk it down into doable steps yet. If you have any tips about getting grants/scholarships please leave a comment. I’m not going to be more specific about my invention here, as it is part of my non-anonymous life. I want to make weekly progress towards that goal, but I’m not sure how to do it yet.

Last, but not least, I’m going to continue to practice dating using my favorite dating book Be Your Own Dating Service.

I wish you the oomph and the urgency to do the things you really love to do. Life really is short. Just do it! :)

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Wow, I can’t believe its day 9 of the cleanse! I called my mom the other day and she said she was sticking to the cleanse, but she was gaining weight because she was eating a lot of cheese. “Cheese!” I exclaimed, betrayed, “but we aren’t eating any dairy!!” She hadn’t noticed that part. We agreed that we could eat yogurt. Then she had the nerve to ask me if she could eat a brownie. “No!” I said, “you can not eat a brownie!” Then I relented and said of course she could eat whatever she wanted to. However, I gave her the advice I saw over on Laura’s weight loss blog, and reminded her that if she asked, her husband would probably make brownies again.

So, what about me? I’m sticking to my cleanse, but am still having trouble eating as many veggies as I would like. I actually like vegetables, but am some what at a loss about what to do with them. I’d like a wok so I could eat [I meant to type "make" ha, Freudian slip! I really just want to EAT homemade stir fry!] homemade stir fry. This morning I came up with an innovative and yummy solution to my no milk and no soy rule (no soy- I’ll explain later.) I used coconut milk in my oatmeal, slices of apples and cinnamon. It was really good. Truly, I want to enjoy eating and have that be a pleasure in my life instead of a utilitarian function.

Exercise: Last Thursday I did my new old Firm video, “Total Body - Time Crunch Workout.” Its only 45 minutes long with simple and hokey and EFFECTIVE exercises. It’s so much easier for me to get myself to work out with weights than to go running, because I know working out with weights is going to show. When I first started working out with weights, (I used “I want those buns!“) I lost 2 inches off my butt in 3 workouts and I’m not exaggerating. My sister-friend told me, “I love your butt!” It still rings in my ear to this day, although the butt she loved is hidden and weak right now. I will raise my rear again! :)

Today I’m going to go try, for the first time ever, the Fitprime video “Strong Bear.” Its with Tracey Long and I can tell its going to be good and tough. I’ll let you know.

Oops! What I haven’t been doing: the P and B shakes. (I bet my mom hasn’t either!) I’ll get on that.

Weight loss: My scale has just (unfortunately, serendipitiously?) died. It’s ok though. From being quite in shape and trim to quite out of shape and plump, I have gained 3 to 5 pounds. That’s why I didn’t notice how out of shape I had gotten for awhile. So, I’ll go by the fit of my jeans and the jib of my… something. (I just wanted to say, “jib.”)

Good Luck in your fitness goals!

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I’ve stuck to the letter, but not the spirit of my cleanse today. Eating food like rice chips with no trans fat and chocolate soy milk with no sugar. Basically a more expensive health food store version of a junky diet. That’s all I want to say about it. I’ll be more enthusiastic tomorrow and I’ll tell you how my new weight-lifting exercise video is.

Today for exercise I ran up and down an animal park. It counts! I was rained on!

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Last night I rebelled and ate fries, onion rings and drank hot chocolate. It was at Denny’s, which is the pit of trans fat. Today I ate only cleanse approved foods, but didn’t eat much because I haven’t gone grocery shopping since cleaning out my fridge.

Good things: My new firm exercise tape came in the mail! Yay! Also my 20 questions about fitness video tape came and I folded my Christmas letters while I watched it. It was motivating, but didn’t pack the punch it did the first time I saw it.

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(This is the sort of topic that makes me wish that this blog was completely anonymous. To all those who know me, sorry if this grosses you out! Just skip these entries!)

My mom is good for many things. One thing that she will do with me, that is hard to find, is weird diets. We have eaten strange concoctions, drunk homemade herbal teas and fasted for days together. So, when I got a yen to do a cleanse I called her. We just spoke and to give you an idea of what a rare commodity she is in a dieting partner, I will relay this short snippet of our conversation.

Me: “Ok, so it will be a pretty simple cleanse, and the only other thing is, I was thinking that at the beginning and the end of our cleanse we could do a colonic.”

Her: “Oh, that sounds nice.”

I’ve done very odd cleanses that involved precise timing and rare ingredients, but this is our simple homemade version. We are going to do a three week long cleanse, cutting out beef, pork, flour, dairy, sugar and trans fats. We can eat any vegis, fruits, poultry and seafood that we want. (Crap, I just realized that no dairy means no butter.) We are going to add two “P and B shakes” daily; that is one Tablespoon of liquid bentonite and one teaspoon of psyllium husks. We’re going to do one colonic in the beginning and one at the end. (I’ve never done one before, I’ll let you know how it goes.) At the end of our cleanse we will only have two days of traditional cleanse weirdness when we do a liquid fast and drink a strange, tightly-timed concoction meant to promote liver cleansing.

Hoped for benefits: Mostly I just feel in need of a general spring cleaning. During the last part of Fall semester I was eating a lot of frozen dinners and canned food. Blech! I want my skin to clear up, I want to lose weight and I want some break in my routine to help me get into healthier eating and exercise habits. I’m blogging it to keep me motivated. Wish me luck!

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