This post was originally a comment in response to a question from an ENFP about career choices on Tribe.net.
My story:
I went from a decade of overwhelming indecision to quickly deciding what I wanted to do and now having a career which I like and with which I can confidently support myself.
My recommendation:
I highly, highly, HIGHLY recommend reading the book What Color is Your Parachute and completing all the exercises. The author, Richard Nelson Bolles, says they take a weekend to complete. The exercises took me two weeks to complete. They are not about making an intuitive leap, they are step by step, small chunk exercises so I found them annoying, and I resisted doing them for years, but when I finally did them, they REALLY HELPED A LOT.
I finally had a picture of what I wanted. It looked like an impossible mix to find in the real world, but I still felt much calmer just knowing what I REALLY wanted.
AMAZINGLY, once I knew the characteristics of the job I really wanted, it took me about 3 weeks to find out what it was. Within three months, I took the GRE, went to grad school in another state, and every day in class, I thought, “I made the right choice. I love this. This is so me.”
More tips:
*Figure out what you want BEFORE you try and figure out what is possible. You might know you would like to do such and such but are wondering if you will be able to find work in that field, or if people will respect you etc… First, figure out what is really important to you, and what would perfectly suit YOU, THEN look into the practical issues. Once you know what you really want, you may find it.
*DO SOMETHING. Take a first imperfect step. I wish I would have heard this advice when I was younger. I spent my 20’s in UTTER indecisiveness and some crappy stop-gap jobs because I wasn’t sure what would be the PERFECT career. I wish I would have known that if I just picked SOMETHING, I could always change my mind later and that whatever I picked wouldn’t be wasted, it would be valuable experience that would help me move on to the next thing.
To sum up: Figure out, to the best of your ability, what is important to you and what you want to do (The exercises in The Parachute really help with this) then CHOOSE SOMETHING and get to it. It doesn’t matter if you have to move, or if it will take four years. You will feel much better taking positive action towards the future than being stuck in a crappy job. It also doesn’t matter if you decide on something new in the future. In fact, it is highly likely that you will do so! You will have more experience and more knowledge. CHOOSE. GO, do it NOW! ;)
-A note about advertising: I think advertising is another job that would fit well with my skill set, but it doesn’t fit with my values. For me, it is VERY important that I contribute something positive to the world. Of course, you could do probably do good in advertising, but it might be challenging to make sure you only worked for ethical companies, etc….
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I know three ENFPs who love their jobs. One is a psychology professor at a liberal arts college, one is a prosecutor and one is a career counselor
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That’s for the words and for the book advice!!
I’d also like to share with you this book I finished that might offer you some new insights. It’s called Harmonic Wealth and it’s all about finding harmony in your life in all areas - financial, relational, mental, physical, and spiritual. It has some really good tips about how to engage all five pillars (or areas) of your life, and to learn more about how they complement each other. Rather than dealing with each issue individually, maybe take a look at the bigger picture.
Here’s the link to that book I recommend: harmonicwealth.com/read
- A James Ray fan
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