Has this ever happened to you?
A few months ago I watched the movie Sicko by Michael Moore and it brought back old memories. I was in the pre-med program during my first three years of college and was very excited about becoming a doctor. One long story later, I changed my direction and got out of the pre-med program. For a few years I wondered if I should have gone to medical school, but eventually I lost the desire to work in medicine, and in recent years I didn’t even remember, on a felt level, why I ever wanted to be a doctor.
In Sicko, when Michael Moore was interviewing a doctor in England, I got a feeling I haven’t had in years. I felt that old desire to be a doctor! It was such a surprise to feel that again and to know that it is still a part of me. It also made it more clear to me why I changed paths. I realized that if medicine in the US was like it is in England or France, where a doctor can really just focus on caring for patients, then I might have continued on that path.
The first part of this clip shows the interview with the British doctor.
I don’t want to go back and finish my studies to be a doctor, (right now, anyway) because I’m in a different place in my life and I don’t want to make that kind of time commitment and, I have found other things that I also love doing. But it is cool and surprising to rediscover parts of myself.
Have you had that happen recently? Have you been reminded of something you loved?
Last night I was in improv, which is a current well-remembered desire. And we played a game that included us making a gesture, everyone coping us, and everyone making up their own meaning for the gesture.
It was fun and satisfying to see people make the same gesture I had made and interpret it in their own way. I really like that! It’s funny how small the components of my satisfaction can be. And I remembered that deep satisfaction I get from choreographing dances! It’s one of the coolest things I have ever experienced- seeing a dance in my head, teaching it to people, and seeing them act it out. That is something I want to pursue again.
If you have any ideas about how an unschooled choreographer can get a group of would be dancers together and get a venue to perform, let me know!
Do you have any old flames that you’d like to bring back into your life?
Let us know! Maybe someone has a good idea for you.
I believe in you.
I believe that God is goodness.
And I believe in you.
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And I see the goodness in you.
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Occasionally I get wistful about my old dreams to be a young adult book writer. Sometimes my rigid editor’s mind cuts and repositions what I write into precise, exceedingly compact prose so automatically that I wonder if I still have it in me.
Other flames…well, I’m working on one now. Just got a new ball rolling as a volunteer in a university lab. We’ll see what flows out of this.
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