Articles by Month

Luft Balloons

My mom and I seemed to have intertwining dreams last night- maybe partly because we are working together to help a family member and have had intertwining conversations.

I dreamed that my mom was going to have a baby. I was hoping it was going to be a boy. I would be happy either way. I was longing for a brother or sister the same way I used to long for one when I was a kid. I was also longing for my mom’s attention and was worried that she would love the baby better than me! When I woke up, I felt positive about the dream.

My mom dreamed that she and I were standing with three toddlers and we were all holding onto helium balloons. One of the toddlers lost the balloon and it floated up into the sky. The toddler was upset. I let go of my balloon so I could tell the toddler, “See, I don’t have a balloon either. Both our balloons are in the sky together.” And then the balloons found each other in the sky and floated away together.

I thought it was really sweet of my mom’s unconscious to give that role to me. Ahhh…  

I want to do balloon art or something. I wish I didn’t have a day of packing ahead of me. Here are some balloon videos in honor of the magical balloon dream.

99 red luft balloons by Nena

You can watch the 34 minute movie The Red Balloon on Google videos.

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

Comforting Thought for the Day: the place you have to push through to is very close

I felt totally overwhelmed yesterday, so naturally, I browsed the internet, spent some time on facebook, and otherwise wiled away my hours. Today, I feel more ready to tackle my “to do” list. This post by Keri Smith helps.

…there is a point where you have to push through and get past the “stuckness”. you can also apply this concept to creating something, as there are often block that come up that make you want to quit. you get overwhelmed at some point and think “this is not working”, I’m not very good at it. but what you don’t know at the time is that the place you have to push through to is very close, just inches or minutes away. it might be a simple as moving one item. but you don’t know that because you’re stuck on the side of uncompletion which feels bad (read: self criticism). those of you reading this who have given birth may recall that the moment most women want to quit is right at the point of “transition”, (when the body is coming through the birth canal). But at that point you are almost done!

this is why it has become so helpful to me to perceive everything as an experiment. because the next step then becomes about trying anything. just make a move no matter what it is and a different conclusion than the one you are faced with will arise.

Click here to check out Keri Smith’s blog.

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

Coriolanus by Shakespeare

Man that play was intense. I just saw it last night. The main charachter is a soldier. Maybe its because one of my friends went to war and came back changed, or maybe its because my cousin’s husband is in the Marines and has turned into an absolute jack ass. This play was really intense for me. I hate what we do to men when we train them and send them to war.

Its funny because I like “Alpha” males. I like strong, daring, confident men. It just makes me sick that we, as a society, use brave men to kill other men, use their valor and honor for unvaliant and dishonorable purposes. Hmmm…  although its not like they don’t have a say in the matter.

I like how Shakespeare shows human nature so well. Its just interesting how the same types of people have been around for a lot of years, at least since Shakespeare’s time! Its kind of disturbing too.

I hate how some people make something as disgusting as war sound honorable. There has got to be a way to honor the power and strength of our men without using them in this way. It makes me sick. I hate that some people in our society do this to our men generation after generation.

Actually, its interesting that I would see this play on Father’s Day because originally Mother’s Day was created by a mother who was outraged about war. In Coriolanus, the mother is very pro-war and pro-warrior, at first anyway.

Its all too familiar, but I think we have made progress over the generations. We’ll see. There will never be a war to end all wars. But maybe there will be a play to end all wars. Then maybe there will be a time when this play doesn’t make any sense to people. That would be good.

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

Happy Father’s Day!

Father and Daughter

Very French, non?

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

Choose a Job you LOVE

Here’s some advice from Gene Siskel to his children. Its embedded in this tribute to him. I found it at Roger Ebert’s tribute to Gene Siskel.

You know, many of us had parents who said that we should have jobs that we can tolerate, or even jobs that are horrible in order to build character. That’s alright. They just didn’t know. Here are some words of advice from a man who knows. And if you didn’t get that advice from your parents, you can pretend Gene Siskel is talking to you:

I want you girls to know, that the one thing that hasn’t been mentioned is that we found a job that we love. And I hope that the work that you do, the work that you choose, that you will take a very quick inventory of it and decide, “Do I love this? Can I love this?” And I don’t mean “like a lot” I mean passionately love; that you would hate having it taken away from you. That’s a very good test.

And, in a few years I hope you’ll remember this and tell your younger brother what I said. I’d appreciate that very, very much.

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

Other Things I Would Like to Do:

(besides watch movies)

  1. I would like to go to Costa Rica for two months and study Spanish and adventure around.
  2. I would like to go on a road trip to Utah with friends, stop by Zion and Mount Timpanogus, of course, and attend GA. And see all my Utah friends!!
  3. I would like to teach a class at a community college and see if I like it.
  4. I would like to go to the 4th of July in Maryland with my family.
  5. I would like to create some public art with other people.
  6. I would like to travel around the US in a comfortable vanish tourish vehicle.
  7. I would like to visit my friends in Tonga, and then visit New Zealand, and Australia. I would like to do all this with my boyfriend (to be).
  8. I would like to make out/cuddle with several of the cute boys I know with no awkward repercussions.
  9. I would like to design and decorate my own house and yard.
  10. I would like to make a house out of mud that I could live in.
  11. I would like to dance with a really good dancer when I go to Salsa this Friday.
  12. I would like to take swing dancing with a really sexy and good swing dancer.
  13. I would like to keep playing improv with my awesome improv people.
  14. I would like to be able to design and make my own clothes.
  15. I would like to ja ja jam with other musicians.
  16. I would like to get pregnant right away with a nice father to be. (Unless I can be biologically younger and then I would like to wait awhile.)
  17. I would like to be the voice for an animated character.
  18. I would like to be the lead singer in a band.
  19. I would like to sing better.
  20. I would like to get a CSA and make yummy delicious salads every week.
  21. I would like to live in a little cottage in my family’s backyard in Maryland and tesseract to visit my friends in CA almost every day.
  22. I would like to go swimming in the Ocean in Hawaii.
  23. I would like to lay on the beach reading a book.
  24. I would like to go to dinner in Italy.
  25. I would like to hang out with my aunties in Portland. 
  26. I would like to go to Spa World with my other auntie, momma, and cousin in Virginia.
  27. I would like to get plenty of stage time.
  28. I would like to be interviewed by David Letterman.
  29. I would like to get super in shape.
  30. I would like to make out with my friend who I love without being hurt emotionally.
  31. I would like to cuddle my little pup and heal him of all his pain.
  32. I would like to put a soothing balm on my Granddad’s brain and body and heal him too.
  33. I would like to leisurely float down a river. 
  34. I would like to lay on the grass with friends at a park.
  35. I would like to meet Roger Ebert and snuggle up to him while we talked - daughter like snuggling.
  36. I would like to give my mom and her husband a little grandbaby!
  37. I would like to go swimming some fresh, not too cold, water.
  38. I would like to go on a backpacking trip with my mom and other people in my family.
  39. I would like to go on a road trip with my cat-dog. 
  40. I would like to go stay over at my friend’s house and have it be as fun as it used to be.
  41. I would like to go to CO and meet Steve Andreas and have him do some work on me.
  42. I would like to write some songs with someone who is a good musician who can help me make my songs better.
  43. I would like to meet Dolly Parton.
  44. Ohhh, since we’re at number 44, I would like to meet the Obamas. 

Ok, this helping me get out of my apathy. There ARE things I would like to do. I just need to figure out how to do them.

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

All I’m in the mood to do is watch movies

…and maybe make out while I watch them.

Have you ever had one of those days? weeks? years? I can’t seem to get myself to envision anything I want to do, but I would like to see the following films:

  1. Tulpan because, as Roger Ebert says, “there has to come a time in everyone’s life when they see a deadpan comedy about the yurt dwellers of Kazakhstan.”
  2. Away We Go because I want to be young, in love, and pregnant. (Hey! There are some things I want to do!)
  3. The Hangover because it sounds fun, and I like that guy from The Office.
  4. The Land of the Lost because it sounds really weird and all the reviewers hate it and the show freaked me out when I was a kid.
  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

There is some GOOOOD music out in the world AHHHHHH!!!

And I’m enjoying it. Here’s Elephant Gun by Beirut

Lyrics

If I was young, I’d flee this town
I’d bury my dreams underground
As did I, we drink to die, we drink tonight

Far from home, elephant gun
Let’s take them down one by one
We’ll lay it down, it’s not been found, it’s not around

Let the seasons begin - it rolls right on
Let the seasons begin - take the big king down

Let the seasons begin - it rolls right on
Let the seasons begin - take the big king down

And it rips through the silence of our camp at night
And it rips through the night

And it rips through the silence of our camp at night
And it rips through the silence, all that is left is all that i hide

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

Photoshop Yourself Thinner

Laura at Starling Fitness is using Photoshop to see what she will look like when she has lost weight.

I think this is a great idea and I have an addendum to it that I think is super important:

Photoshop your face onto someone who you will actually look like when you are thinner.

How do you do this?? Well, if you were ever at your goal weight, you know what you looked like when you were thinner. Of course, then you don’t need to use photoshop, you can just look at a picture of your previous self.

OTHERWISE, a really great way is to look at the book called The Science of Sexy. I love this book. You can find your body shape, height, and weight to see what would look good on you. Once you find your body shape and height, you can see what you will look like when you lose weight.

And the best part? At least when it comes to finding a body to photoshop your head onto: the book lists a celebrity stand in for each body type, height, and weight!

emmekate-winslet-bafta-awardscindy crawford

Its pretty fun to see what celebrity you look like now, and which one you will look like! (Its a great way to get style ideas!)

The downside: the body types are pretty simplistic.  There are only 4 body types listed. If you want to get a really good idea of your body type, go to Myshape.com and create a personal shop. You put your measurements in and they will tell you what your body type is. The measurements won’t lie. The advantage of The Science of Sexy is that there is a celebrity stand in!

Science of Sexy

(Bonus with myshape: I love updating my measurements as I lose weight and seeing what new clothes are in my shop. The clothes are way too expensive for me, but its still fun online window shopping!)

So, find your celebrity stand in today! My current celebrity is Emme, my goal weight stand in is Kate Winslet. My super thin celebrity is Cindy Crawford. And yes, I was once close to the Cindy Crawford weight. And yes, I did get asked a LOT then! :)  (I was also 21 at the time which helps! :)

Science of sexy excerpt

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts

High Tide in Tuscon

Walking out in the rain today, I stopped in at the library for shelter and grabbed a book off the “Staff recommends” shelf: High Tide in Tuscon by Barbara Kingsolver. Below is an excerpt of the first essay. It was just what I needed. I’m often blessed by the God of Books.

A hermit crab lives in my house. Here in the desert he’s hiding out from local animal ordinances, at minimum, and maybe even the international laws of native-species transport. For sure, he’s an outlaw against nature. So be it.

He arrived as a stowaway two Octobers ago. I had spent a week in the Bahamas, and while I was there, wishing my daughter could see those sparkling blue bays and sandy coves, I did exactly what she would have done: I collected shells. Spiky murexes, smooth purple moon shells, ancient-looking whelks sand-blasted by the tide. I tucked them in the pockets of my shirt and shorts until my lumpy suspect hemlines gave me away, like a refugee smuggling the family fortune. When it was time to go home, I rinsed my loot in the sink and packed it carefully into a plastic carton, then nested it deep in my suitcase for the journey to Arizona.

I got home in the middle of the night, but couldn’t wait till morning to show my hand. I set the carton on the coffee table for my daughter to open. In the dark living room her face glowed, in the way of antique stories about children and treasure. With perfect delicacy she laid the shells on the table, counting, sorting, designating scientific categories like yellow-striped pinky, Barnacle Bill’s pocketbook… Yeek! She let loose a sudden yelp, dropped her booty, and ran to the far end of the room. The largest, knottiest whelk had begun to move around. First it extended one long red talon of a leg, tap-tap-tapping like a blind man’s cane. Then came half a dozen more red legs, plus a pair of eyes on stalks, and a purple claw that snapped open and shut in a way that could not mean We Come in Friendship.

Who could blame this creature? It had fallen asleep to the sound of the Caribbean tide and awakened on a coffee table in Tucson, Arizona, where the nearest standing water source of any real account was the municipal sewage-treatment plant.

With red stilleto legs splayed in all directions, it lunged and jerked its huge shell this way and that, reminding me of the scene I make whenever I’m moved to rearrange the living-room sofa by myself. Then, while we watched in stunned reverence, the strange beast found its bearings and began to reveal a determined, crabby grace. It felt its way to the edge of the table and eased itself over, not falling bang to the floor but hanging suspended underneath within the long grasp of its ice-tong legs, lifting any two or three at a time while many others still held in place. In this remarkable fashion it scrambled around the underside of the table’s rim, swift and sure and fearless like a rock climber’s dream.

If you ask me, when something extraordinary shows up in your life in the middle of the night, you give it a name and make it the best home you can.

I hope you get a chance to read the rest of it. To me, it spoke about my current search: to find a life, a place, a home that fits my inner tides.

  • Share/Save/Bookmark

Related posts